The Little Things In Life

These days, it doesn't take much to get me excited. I was thinking about some of them at 1:15am this morning as I'm hacking my lungs up from one of those beginning of the year colds!
5 for $10 name brand cereal
cars that don't blow smoke out the muffler
not having enough dirty clothes to wash a full load of laundry tonight
making two meals tonight for dinner so that we don't cook tomorrow (notice I said, "we." My man is good!)
Spending the afternoon with my mom and nephew feeding ducks at Lake Ella (YEs, I did help feed ducks!)
There's plenty more but I think the coughing has subsided and I've got to get some sleep!

This Time Last Year...

This time last year I was on cloud nine because Josh told me he loved me. I was also confused and uncertain about the future and where that love would take me. This time last year I was slowly getting the hang of teaching 8 little friends with severe and profound disabilities. I came home exhausted but happy about their sweet enthusiasm.
Now... its that time, THIS year and I couldn't be more settled. Living in a double wide helping to care for my soon-to-be father-in-law.
...Knowing that at 5:15pm I can guarantee that the man of my dreams will be pulling into the yard from work. Anxously awaiting the birth of my third nephew. Taking in a roller coaster of emotions as I plan my very own wedding. Who'd of ever thought that!?! Time sure does fly and I'm trying to take in every minute and appreciate those little things in life!

An End To A Legend...

I've been living in denial for quite some time now. Reality hit me two Fridays ago. I was in the drive-thru at McDonalds when all of a sudden I hear a loud baboom as white smoke came swooshing out of my Honda CRV. I left the car at my parents' house and waited for the news. My step-dad called me and told me it was time to bury it. The compressor was bad, the radiator fan needed to be replaced, (not to mention he had just replaced the radiator a month before,)the transmission was skipping and the catalytic converter was well... we weren't sure when it was going to go but its been bad for over 5 years.(there were more issues but after 217,000 miles, who's complaining?) On August 28th, 2009, I said my final goodbye to my sweet ole Honda CRV. I tell you, I felt like I was giving a kid away. I even cried. I felt like a traitor driving home in my new 2009 Hyundai Santa Fe. Its been a whole week now and the grief is slowly going away. It helps that I have cold air coming out of the a/c vents and my driver side window rolls down with the press of a button. I'm blessed to have gotten a great interest rate and a reasonable payment.

Engagement Pics

Random Thoughts

Its 5:15am and I can't sleep because my sinuses are draining and I can't stop coughing. I decided to get up and blog so that poor Josh could get some sleep. I just took a Zyrtec and my nasal spray. Now I'm eating Wheat Thins and drinking Diet Mountain Dew. So much for my 3-day protein only diet! I figure if I continue to gain/lose the same 4 pounds I'll be ok. LOL!

Its hard to believe that I'll be Mrs. Joshua Register in less than eight months. While its got to be the scariest thing I've ever done, I definitely feel its apart of God's plan. The saying, "good things come to those who wait," is definitely true. Now don't get me wrong, the grass ain't always greener over on my side of the doublewide but it sure gets cut on a regular basis and I have unconditional love from a man who makes me feel like I'm a princess. Is it possible to grow more and more attracted to someone as time goes by? I guess I'm scared because of my past relationships, fear of being left alone and things I've seen happen in other people's relationships. ( I know that was so incredibly wordy, but hey... 5:20am!) Anyway, I just pray everyday and try to keep an open line of communication.

My friend Wendi's daughter will be going to school in St. Augustine in the fall. I am so excited for her. Wendi jokes and says she is me made over. While I'm honored, and I definitely see the similarities, I'd have to say Chellsea has a lot more spunk than I did at her age. Her self-confidence exudes her. Anyway, she told me the other day that her anxiety is building because of the unknown but she knows its all apart of God's plan for her. My advice to her was to enjoy every minute/opportunity she has and not to worry so much about the future. Gee... here's a thought... maybe I should take my own advice!

Well, I think the Zyrtec is kicking in. I'll blog later on. I have some wedding updates to share. Love, J

My Newest Nephew

Here are 3-D/4-D ultra sound pictures of Baby Tucker... that's what Thomas calls him. Poor kid... he'll be Baby Tucker even when he's 30. Anyway, he's already bigger than Thomas was at 27 weeks! Molly is huge. I told Thomas that Molly ate Baby Tucker and that's why she's so big. He looked at me very confused and asked, "Mamma, why you eat Baby Tucker?" In the first picture he's actually smiling. Molly said that after about 4 or 5 pics he got pissed and quit smiling. He's so big they had to poke and prod to get good pictures. I don't have a picture of the money shot, if you catch my drift, but lets just say... he and his brother will be no competition in the locker room!





Its funny how I've never even met this kid and yet I feel a connection. I am so excited about our newest edition. I can't believe all the love that surrounds me. Its overwhelming at times.

Change of Plans

We are getting married February 27, 2010 instead of April 3rd. Originally, I wanted to get married at a place called Bradley's Pond but they were booked for April 3rd. Apparently, everybody likes to get married in the spring. So, I decided to get married at the church I grew up in and have the reception at the Shriner's Club, just like my sister did. I set the April 3rd date not realizing that was Easter weekend. I thought that weekend would be perfect because it was the start of my spring break. When I called the church to find out when I could have the rehearsal they told me I couldn't because of Easter festivities going on that week. The more I thought about it, the more I realized that I really wanted to get married at Bradleys. Soooo, after discussing all of this with Josh we decided to go with Bradley's. February 27th was the latest they had available before my spring break so we took it!

Wedding Plans

Here is the website for our wedding: http://www.theknot.com/ourwedding/JanieTucker&JoshuaRegister. Its a work in progress so bear with me. Since I can remember, I've dreamed of having the perfect wedding. Now the time has come to plan and I'm a bit overwhelmed. I never knew there were so many shades of teal! It'll all come together.

Thank the Lord... We did it!

As I've mentioned before, Josh's dad Tiny had a stroke back in late February. It left his left side pretty weak. Before the stroke he weighed around 350 pounds. He is now under 300. He is able to walk using a walker but his left knee is bone to bone and sometimes it gives out on him... get the picture.

Anyway, he had some errands he needed to take care of today so I took him. Uncle Larry came by and helped me get him in the car and then we were off. We had to take care of some things at the bank. I prayed very hard that I'd be able to help him get back inside the car. I realize now that my CRV is quite narrow and doesn't accommodate tall people. Anyway, the Lord was looking down on us today and all was well. Tiny got in and out of the car all with little help from me and he didn't have to go to the bathroom while we were out!

As I'm blogging this, I'm reminded of the people I saw this weekend in Orlando. I went to the Family Cafe. Its a conference for families and caregivers of people with special needs. My heart went out to the families I saw with older children in wheelchairs. Of course I felt for the children too. A lady had to change a 12 or so year old girl on a changing table designed for a small child. There are times I get disheartened because we can't just pick up and go like most young couples can then I'm reminded that there is a reason for everything. And, just when I think I have it bad, I think back to when I lived alone in my house and how I knew something was missing but didn't know just what it was. Life isn't so bad afterall!

My Boys

This is a picture of Josh and his daddy May a year ago at Kelley's wedding. I sometimes have to laugh at how humorous life can be. My daddy died when I was 12. My whole life I wanted nothing more than to have a daddy. Now that I am marrying Josh not only am I getting a husband but I got a dad too. (Although, he's more like our son most of the time, lol!)I guess its a 2-4-1 deal.

Janie and Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day!

If you've ever read this book you'll understand the title of my blog. Its a cute book about a little guy named Alexander who has a very bad day. That was me, yesterday.

See, I took this class with our district called Level II Leadership program. It was a wonderful opportunity to learn about administration and the Florida Leadership Standards. As a culminating activity, each candidate was required to go through something called Targeted Selection. In a true TS, its an opportunity for school board administrators to interview candidates who are applying for a principal/assistant principal's position. It involves a team panel of "big wigs" who ask you questions about your leadership experiences. Then, as you are answering the questions, they critique you on your answers.

I had on my calendar that I was supposed to go through TS on Wednesday, June 10th. Guess what??? My interview was Tuesday, June 9th. I'm teaching Voluntary Pre-K this summer. So, our school secretary called me out of the cafeteria around 8:30am Tuesday morning and says, "Janie, the HR lady just called and said you are supposed to be in an interview right now." I gulped! Fortunately another teacher was going through the same interview and was dressed for the occasion. So, she switched times with me. I, on the other hand, was dressed in flip flops, shorts and a t-shirt. I had a pair of dress pants in my car that I needed to return to a friend. My principal told me to go and do whatever I needed to get ready. So, I made a mad dash to Wal-Mart bought a $7 pearl set, blouse, pantyhose and a $2.50 pair of heels. I have to say, I didn't look too shabby.

Unfortunately, I went in to the interview with a complex... I was embarrassed about switching up the days and I also didn't study enough (i.e. I thought I had one more day.) To top it off, my very first principal was also in the room. I have the utmost respect for him. Talk about nerves! I felt like I was on The American Idol. The first guy to ask me a question, let's call him Simon, was brass and told me right away, before I even had time to show any emotion, that if I was emotional to suck it up because they were about to lay it all out there. That of course caused me to turn a bright red. Then, once I began answering the question he says in a loud voice, "stop right there!" and critizes my answer. Needless to say, the waterworks began. I haven't been this humilated since I tried out for the flag corp in high school. The head HR lady was in the interview with me and she suggested we go get a drink of water. I'm telling you, if I could have, I would have ran far, far away but she encouraged me to go back and give it my best shot. To make a long story short, I survived. While it was painful, it was definitely a great learning experience. I'm thankful to have been apart of it. I also know that unless I start taking testosterone shots (that was my nice way of saying, "growing balls,") I have absolutely NO desire to become a principal.

I pretty much cried off and on the rest of the day. That evening I was thinking about things and realized that maybe it wasn't so much the interview as it was I had doubled up on my birth control pills because I had forgotten to take them the night before. I think I OD'd on hormones, lol! Geez Louise!

That night, Josh and I were able to go to dinner. I had a very large beer and a great dinner. So, at least the day ended on a good note!

Mother's Day 2009

We enjoyed a delicious meal at Marie Livingston's again this year. No, Molly didn't eat too much. She's preggo! Tucker Edward Clore will be making his debut mid September. We are thrilled!

Hey Blogger Fans... I'm back!

I'm the biggest slacker ever. I just realized that its been 2 whole months since I've blogged! I do have good excuses though. About a week after I last blogged, Josh's dad had a stroke. It did some serious damage to his left side. It took us a week to get the neurologist to realize the seriousness of the situation. Then he spent a week in the hospital being evaluated. Finally, he went to rehab and was there for about 2 months. During that time, we were back and forth visiting him and making sure that he was being cared for.

During all of this, I was slowly moving my stuff into Josh's house while he was remodeling a bedroom for me. He finished it Mid march. It looks fantastic. I'll have to post some pictures. I put my house on the market in April for rent. My renters moved in May 15th. So, between April and May, Josh worked hard to patch holes and move heavy furniture out of my house.

Josh's dad came home May 1st. He is doing remarkable but he can't be left alone and needs assistance getting in and out of bed.

May 13th, Josh and I celebrated a year being together. I can't believe where the time went. It feels like we've been together forever though. Its funny how one person can complete my life the way he does.

This past weekend we went to St. Augustine for our anniversary and JOsh proposed! I was shocked. I knew it was coming but I had no clue as to when or where. I'll post pictures of the proposal once I get them developed. My camara died so I had to buy a disposable one. I'm working on a wedding website. Once I get some more details, I'll send everyone the link.

I know most of you have already seen the picture of the ring but here it is again:

I have dreamed of this day and now that it is here, I am still in shock! I feel like a princess. Ok, enough with the mushy stuff...

I'm actually the queen of this double wide trailor! LOL! Seriously, there's so much to be done around here. Please pray that God gives me the calmness I need to not get overwhelmed by it all. Its not like the boxes are going to go anywhere. And as for the remodeling... well, all in good time!

Valentine's Day 2009

This had to be the best Valentine's Day ever. Not only did Josh buy me the most beautiful bouquet of roses, he brought them to me at work! I was sick as a dog with a double ear infection on Valentine's so Josh took care of me and even grilled me a steak, made twiced bake potatoes and a salad to die for. I am one lucky woman.
I had to laugh when I looked back at last years post about Valentine's Day. Here is a picture I posted:

Things sure have changed for me!

I Hate Embarq

You know, you'd think after transferring my phone number and internet as much as I do, it would be a piece of cake, right? WRONG!!! Talk about sending me over the edge, this time about did it. I transferred my phone service to Josh’s house the second of February so Embarq assigned me a new phone number. (That would be the 574 # that I text to everybody, first.) The phone service was supposed to be connected on Wednesday, February 11th. I get home and try to call the number and guess what??? The 574 # doesn’t work! Instead I have a 575#. (That would be the second number that I text to everybody!) On Thursday, I called and complained. By Friday, not only was my internet not up and running, I had no phone service at all!!! After spending 3 days on the phone with Embarq and expressing my extreme unhappiness they fixed the problem. Those of you who know me from my “partying” days, know that I am notorious for transposing numbers so I figured it was my fault for the confusion. This time, it wasn’t!

Lots and Lots of Updates

I know, I'm a slacker. Its been a whole month since I've blogged. This has been for a number of reasons. First because, I've been spending most of time at Josh's house and didn't get my internet transfered here until last Monday. I will post a nice long entry about that fiasco in a moment. Two, things are going pretty well with the move situation and I'm afraid that if I blog, I'll jinx it. I almost had a nervous breakdown (not really but you know what I mean...) at the beginning of the month when I transfered my cable and phone services to Josh's house. At first I thought it was because I felt like I was giving up my brand new house for an older house that wasn't even mine. Then as the week progressed and I actually shared my feelings with Josh, I realized it wasn't so much the physical/cosmetics of the whole deal but rather that I feared losing my independence by living with him. Josh has been soooo patient with me and I now realize that it doesn't matter if we live in a tent. What matters is that we are together. I think I've found a keeper. Which of course is another big adjustment. I'm used to being on my own, taking care of me and basically doing things on my own. Its taking some getting used to but I'm slowing adjusting to having someone there to help me and love me for me. (you know what I mean, someone besides my mother, lol!)

The House On 59 Chickat Trail

I think I've finally decided to put my house up for rent and move in with Josh. I'm going to list it with a realty company so that I don't have to deal with crazy rentors. Please pray that I can even find somebody to rent it and that they will take somewhat decent care of the place.

The other day I was thinking about this house and just how much I love it. I've been going back and forth about this move because for one, it was such a big deal for me to buy this place and two, its mine... (well, actually it belongs to Chase for 29 more years) but what I mean is, I decorated it to my likings, I picked it out, and well, you get the picture.

It didn't hit me until this morning while I was getting ready for work, that this house has served it purpose. When I bought it, I was at a point in my life where I thought I'd never get married and I needed to make some plans for the future and settle down. Buying this house made me feel like I had accomplished something. It helped fill some of the emptiness in my life. Unbeknown (spelling?) to me, the man of my dreams was living 27 miles away and I was teaching with his cousin!

After thinking about the purpose this house has served I started thinking about the other numerous places I've lived and despite how small or old they were I always seemed to make them feel homey.

Ironically today, Amber brought in this cd recording of her pastor's sermon from last Sunday. In it he talked about worldly possessions and how none of them really matters. What matters is loving God and being in His will. The pastor also talked about being with/doing things for the people you love. That made me think of Josh. I truly love him and I feel at home when I'm at his house. I can decorate his house and make it just as homey as my house on 59 Chickat Trail.

Now that I've blogged my guts out about this matter, please pray that I don't have a panic attack and change my mind,lol!

I pity the day when...

my nephew Thomas plays team sports. Tonight I went out in the freezing cold to watch Noah, my oldest nephew play soccer. He is really good at it, by the way. Anyway, this bigger kid on the other team kept elbowing the players on Noah's team when they came in contact with the ball. I don't know much about sports but I do know that in soccer you are NOT supposed to touch the players. The coach from Noah's team discussed this with the refs at half time and they just laughed and shrugged it off. I'm not quite sure what came over me but when I saw the kid elbow Noah I jumped up and yelled as loud as I could, "get your hands off of him." It was sheer divine intervention that I didn't curse b/c those of you who know me, know that I have the mouth of a sailor. It was sort of funny the way it all happened because I didn't even think twice. I just instinctually yelled. I have a feeling I'm going to be the mom that's banned from the field!

Family Pic

Here is a picture we took on Christmas day. Again... bittersweet... bitter without my daddy, but ever so sweet because of Josh, Eric and Thomas. Anyway, I love this picture. I just notice that I think both Eric and Josh's eyes are closed. Too funny!

Hunting 101

I forgot to blog about my hunting experience back in November. While it was great to spend the day with Josh, let's just say I've decided that is his thing and from now on, we will leave it at that. He can hunt and I'll shop.

In case you ever decide to go hunting here are a few things I learned from my short lived experience...
1. take a bucket and a tarp in case you have to go potty (I'm not talking about peeing, if you catch my drift.)
2. take along a cell phone, books, magazines and/or a laptop (you will sit for hours!)
3. bring a lot of snacks (just incase the dogs get lost and you have to wait around to find them)

It ended up pouring down rain that afternoon and the only thing we saw was an 8 foot gator! I think Josh planned that so that I would never want to go with him again, lol! He asks me from time to time with a big grin on his face if I want to go and I politely tell him "h*!l no"

Christmas 2008

This Christmas was bittersweet. It marked the 20th anniversary (if that's the correct wording) of my daddy's death. It was also my first Christmas with Josh. He bought a beautiful diamond necklace along with some other things. He also gave me a card that he wrote a sweet message inside of. I sound shallow talking about the gifts. It wasn't the gifts that made it so special it was him being there. He helped me decorate my Christmas tree. He made gingerbread cookies for my kiddos at school. He also met my mom's side of the family and lived to tell about it! I'm not sure how I got so lucky to find such a good guy but I did. I've never had anyone treat me so good or make me feel the way he does. Maybe that's why this Christmas was so bittersweet. My sister said she sort of felt the same way this year. Life is going really well. So well that its scary. I know I can't live life in fear of what tomorrow will bring but its so hard not to. There were times this holiday season that I cried for no apparent reason. Looking back I think it was the fear of losing something so wonderful. Poor Josh, he's a trooper. I hope that I get better about this in time.

This is my favorite picture so far. It was taken on Christmas Eve. I'm not sure why Josh looks so red. He's not really!

Updates

I haven't blogged about anything serious in quite a while. The funny thing is I have a ton to blog about but am unsure how to put it all in words. Where to begin... Thanksgiving weekend Josh asked me about moving in with him. While I'm excited about this I am also scared as hell. First of all, I've been on my own for quite a while now. I love spending time with Josh but I also like that when I need a break I can go back to my house. Then there's the fact that there is no way I can sell my house with the way the market is right now. I think I can rent it out but my fear is that I can't. And if I can't, I can't afford to help Josh with his mortgage. (He laughed when I told him that and said that I'd be investing in our future by continuing to pay on my mortgage and not to worry about that.) However, my pride continues to get in the way...

On a positive note, its funny how comfortable I feel at his house. Its warm and you can tell that its seen alot of love over the years. It does need some cosmetic surgery but I think I can handle that. The house used to belong to his mom and dad so it's still decorated exactly the way his mom left it before she died. I explained to Josh that I feel like I'd be imposing if I came in and redecorated. He said he thought his mom would appreciate me changing things. We shall see... I've been doing things little by little. My plan is to wait until hunting season is over to make any major decisions about renting my place out and/or encouraging Josh to fix his place up.

One of my biggest fears about moving was lifted tonight at dinner. I was so afraid to talk to my mom about moving. I don't know why. I guess I was afraid I would disappoint her. This move would mean me moving 25 miles away from her and me giving up a house I worked so hard to get. My step-dad jokingly said to me tonight, "isn't about time for you to sell your house? You're never there." I casually mentioned that I didn't have enough equity in it but had thought about renting it out. My mom didn't even looked shocked. She said that would be a good idea until the market got better. I said I was scared to rent it out though for fear that things wouldn't work out between me and Josh and I'd be homeless. She rolled her eyes and said that I'd always have a place to live. So, now that I have her blessing, I feel much better.

While I love my house and am extremely grateful to have it, its just that... a house. It feels empty. When I'm at Josh's I feel warm. Not to mention the fact that I'm 12 minutes away from Osaka's, my favorite sushi restaurant!

Bottom line... I'm going to keep praying about it. We will see what the future holds.